Phionny (29)

I used to think maths was useless, but then one day I realised that decimals had a point.

Q: Why can't atheists solve exponential equations?
A: Because they don't believe in higher powers.

Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them, they translate it into their own language, and forthwith it means something entirely different.

A group of protesters in front of a physics lab:
"What do we want?"
"Time travel!!!"
"When do we want it?"
"Irrelevant!"

chicco0 rekrutiert

Q: What does a mathematicians answer, when you ask him/her if (s)he wants
the window open or closed?
A: Yes.

1) Pick a number between 1 and 9

2) Subtract 5

3) Multiply by 3

4) Square the number

5) Add the digits of that number together, for example, if you number is
83, you would add 8 and 3 and get 11.

6) If the resulting number is less than 5, add five, otherwise subtract 4

7) Multiply by 2

8) Subtract 6

9) Assign a letter to your number. A=1, B=2, C=3, D=4, E=5, etc

10) Pick a country that begins with your letter

11) Pick an animal that begins with the second letter from your country

12) think of the color of that animal....

If Schrodinger's Cat loses an electron, does it become Schrodinger's Cation?

Q: What's the best part about dating a female physicist?
A: They always give you a hadron